Abubilla Music

Diet Coke

Written by Jimmy

This band is 72% Diet Coke.   Ocado (Waitrose home delivery service with guy that we like as much as the Papa John guy — it is amazing how many people ring our door bell and give us stuff) delivers Diet Coke in those 24 can square boxes that Coke now flogs.    The band consumes 1 to 1 and 1/2 of these each Saturday.   It is so bad that:

• We have to label our coke cans with different colour tape so we don’t confuse each other and don’t pass around Ed’s swine flu.
• We know exactly how much diet coke equates to a BPM.  We can literally increase the tempo of a song by all consuming the prescribed amount.
• Martyn and Rob have perfected this further by knowing the exact amount of beer that  offsets the BPM effect of diet coke.  They are like Mad Scientists mixing the perfect elixer depending on tempo.
• At around 1145, post 8 diet cokes each, and pre the carb coma from Papa John’s, we talk really fast to each other.  and we use a lot more chords.  And we add a lot more phrases into lyrics.  After lunch we find our pre-lunch take pretty incomprehensible.

My Mom points out that you never see skinny people drink diet coke.  Please refer to our Pizza blog.